As I embarked on my journey of finding employment I had to ask myself many questions. I challenged myself by answering big picture questions to narrow down my interests so that I could start looking for employment in specific areas. I went through a bulk of these questions in my previous entry. The one question that remains unanswered and nags at me in my waking day is 'what is your passion in life?' I am envious of those people that can answer this question, sometimes with a single word. I have spent most of my life tracking down 'passion' without success.
I can't help but notice the aggressive nature that surrounds finding a new job. I am job hunting and tracking down my passion, I am testing my strength and patience and pushing forward through rejection. So many aggressive adjectives to describe this experience of getting back into the work force. And I can feel the weight of these words, they aren't just a cute narrative of my day. It is an experience that I am trudging through each day.
This aggressive state that I now live in has pushed me to seek serenity in any form possible. When at home I take long baths and gravitate towards funny movies. I eat candy without regret and treat each day like I am on vacation, not worrying about my future. At work, where I sit behind a computer and watch the clock, I have begun occupying my time with reading refurnishing blogs. I have absorbed myself in my Pinterest site (www.pinterest.com) looking for creative DIY (do it yourself) projects. I started collecting furniture magazines and put sticky notes on creative arrangements in the home.
With my current job I have plenty of time to myself so I have been lazily daydreaming. I could be organizing my finances for this upcoming tax season or filling out that insurance form to protect Evan's instruments. But instead, I catch myself planning out entire projects from finish to end. Projects that involve using my hands. I always return to this imagine of the sun shining through a window in the early morning as I am busily staining fresh wood or drilling holes for hardware. All the time, I have a half smile on my face and half set eyelids. I am happy.
For all the 'tracking' I have done in search of my passion I am uncertain if this could be my calling? I have been actively pursuing the chase and now in the middle of a quite day I am daydreaming of refurbishing furniture or building new pieces from raw materials and finding peace. Is this a sign or am I feeling deprived on my own space since I live in my fiance's parent's cabin currently? I guess to find out I am going to set about doing a refurbishing project and see how I feel afterwards.
Will post more as I embark on this new project!
Monday, December 19, 2011
Friday, December 16, 2011
A tribute to Jamie
It was my mother-in-law's 60th birthday yesterday and for the celebration I wrote a story for her about my favorite Jamie moment. I thought I would share it here since it is pretty cute:
My favorite Jamie moments are centered around her theatrics. At the top of the list was the night Dwight and Jamie teamed up to play Evan and I in Cranium. We were half way through the game and the Jamie/Dwight team was trailing behind. They needed a big win to get them back in the game. Jamie was up. She rolled the dice and advanced to a green space indicating she would need to act or hum the clue on the card for Dwight to guess. The card was pulled and there was a moment of silence as Jamie concentrated on the task at hand. A moment later Jamie read out loud the rules on the card indicating she would need to act out an action clue. The timer was flipped and the show began!
Dwight, Evan and I watched in anticipation. Jamie began by slapping her hands on her belly. Unable to make any sounds or speak she continued to slap her stomach. Without a response from her partner, she tried a different approach and rubbed her hands over her head and down to her feet This prompted Dwight who said "rubbing?" and then "ummm . . . what?" Jamie continued the show by patting her shoulders and then her legs. She started the familiar routine of sweeping her hands from her head down to her toes with growing frustration. Dwight was silent except for an occasional "what?". The grains of sand had slipped through the narrow squeeze of the hour glass indicating the passing of time. The answer would have to be discovered soon, time was running out.
To Jamie's relief Dwight guessed, "body!" Jamie's eyes widened as she nodded her head in excitement. But it wasn't over, the answer was an action clue and body is a noun. Jamie had looked down at the floor and hesitated for a moment before flinging her entire body down onto the hardwood floors in the living room. She had performed a belly flop which made the pieces of the board game jump into the air and had us all agasp. Evan and I peered over the rim of the coffee table to discoverJamie swimming on the floor with determination. It wasn't long before she popped back up onto her feet and began waving her hands in the air. Dwight was still in a state of shock from the daredevilish dive Jamie performed when Jamie had turned to Dwight and put her hands up into the air indicating a silent, "well?"
Dwight said, "what?" Jamie had thrown her hands back down to her side and again was airborn. The thud shook us as we all stared in puzzled amazement. Jamie ran through the routine and when she again was standing on her feet turned to Dwight indicating he needed to guess something, anything! But the only words that left Dwight were "what?" between wheezing sputters of laughter. Jamie had turned red in the face from her laberous routine which did not produce a single guess from her partner.
Up and down, up and down Jamie soared threw the air as the three of us were struggling for breath, our diaphrams quaked with laughter. None of us had taken notice that all the sand was resting in the lower half of the hour glass. Jamie had labored in vain but her courageaous efforts we applauded. After we had regained control of our breathing and wiped the tears of joy from our eyes we asked almost in unison, "What was the answer?". Jamie tight lipped said, "body boarding" before sitting next to Dwight who she gave a playful slap. Dwight again broke out into laugher and exclaimed one last "WHAT!?!" which caused Jamie to dart a glare in her partners direction.
Needless to say, Evan and I won the game of Cranium and pleeded with Dwight and Jamie to play another round. Jamie agreed on the conditions that we switched partners.
Happy Birthday Jamie!
My favorite Jamie moments are centered around her theatrics. At the top of the list was the night Dwight and Jamie teamed up to play Evan and I in Cranium. We were half way through the game and the Jamie/Dwight team was trailing behind. They needed a big win to get them back in the game. Jamie was up. She rolled the dice and advanced to a green space indicating she would need to act or hum the clue on the card for Dwight to guess. The card was pulled and there was a moment of silence as Jamie concentrated on the task at hand. A moment later Jamie read out loud the rules on the card indicating she would need to act out an action clue. The timer was flipped and the show began!
Dwight, Evan and I watched in anticipation. Jamie began by slapping her hands on her belly. Unable to make any sounds or speak she continued to slap her stomach. Without a response from her partner, she tried a different approach and rubbed her hands over her head and down to her feet This prompted Dwight who said "rubbing?" and then "ummm . . . what?" Jamie continued the show by patting her shoulders and then her legs. She started the familiar routine of sweeping her hands from her head down to her toes with growing frustration. Dwight was silent except for an occasional "what?". The grains of sand had slipped through the narrow squeeze of the hour glass indicating the passing of time. The answer would have to be discovered soon, time was running out.
To Jamie's relief Dwight guessed, "body!" Jamie's eyes widened as she nodded her head in excitement. But it wasn't over, the answer was an action clue and body is a noun. Jamie had looked down at the floor and hesitated for a moment before flinging her entire body down onto the hardwood floors in the living room. She had performed a belly flop which made the pieces of the board game jump into the air and had us all agasp. Evan and I peered over the rim of the coffee table to discoverJamie swimming on the floor with determination. It wasn't long before she popped back up onto her feet and began waving her hands in the air. Dwight was still in a state of shock from the daredevilish dive Jamie performed when Jamie had turned to Dwight and put her hands up into the air indicating a silent, "well?"
Dwight said, "what?" Jamie had thrown her hands back down to her side and again was airborn. The thud shook us as we all stared in puzzled amazement. Jamie ran through the routine and when she again was standing on her feet turned to Dwight indicating he needed to guess something, anything! But the only words that left Dwight were "what?" between wheezing sputters of laughter. Jamie had turned red in the face from her laberous routine which did not produce a single guess from her partner.
Up and down, up and down Jamie soared threw the air as the three of us were struggling for breath, our diaphrams quaked with laughter. None of us had taken notice that all the sand was resting in the lower half of the hour glass. Jamie had labored in vain but her courageaous efforts we applauded. After we had regained control of our breathing and wiped the tears of joy from our eyes we asked almost in unison, "What was the answer?". Jamie tight lipped said, "body boarding" before sitting next to Dwight who she gave a playful slap. Dwight again broke out into laugher and exclaimed one last "WHAT!?!" which caused Jamie to dart a glare in her partners direction.
Needless to say, Evan and I won the game of Cranium and pleeded with Dwight and Jamie to play another round. Jamie agreed on the conditions that we switched partners.
Happy Birthday Jamie!
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Opening up to the way the world works
It's time for an update! Much has happened over the last few weeks. I started my job working in the Office of the Bursar at Indiana University and just this week I had an interview in New York for a position in the Registrar's Office at the State University of New York (the Purchase campus). As I wait to hear back with fingers crossed, I reflect on the process of job searching.
Job searching or hunting which denotes a struggle for survival, is not for the faint of heart. First, the application process. The process of putting together a resume that is appealing to the eyes in it's format as well as appealing to the brain for its content. It is a gamble deciding what words from the English language you should use. Now a days, most job applications have to be submitted through the Internet. No one wants a paper copy or an email with a resume attached. I have discovered they do this for very specific reasons.
When you submit a resume and cover letter into the company of interest's data system the system performs a simple word association scan. If your resume and cover letter contain a number of keywords that have been entered into the system as desirable then your application is elevated to an observation level and into human hands. So if you aren't careful in choosing your words, your application may be sent right into the cyber recycling bin without a second thought. I think of my resume screaming out as it is being sucked into a giant black hole, never to be found again!
So if you manage to survive the computer scan and make it onto the hands of a living being it doesn't mean you have finally arrived. Humans are critical and can dismiss your application for far less sophisticated reasons. For example, a manager in his/her late 50's may be threatened by a young wo/man with more education and experience and therefore may dismiss the application for his/her own security. Or even more cynical, a wo/man might simply not like the applicants name because of a past event!
I know it may seem silly or improbable to think people are so shallow but unfortunately, we are! So even if you choose all the right words your application can come to a screeching halt due to uncontrollable circumstances. However, if you have a name that doesn't trigger a PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) event in your future supervisor and are lucky enough to have a well adjusted person review your application you may just find yourself in line for an interview.
The interview, for me, is the least of my worries. I feel that I am an easy person to get along with and in a short amount of time can let my personality shine through. Maybe it's all those social events in NYC that have brought me into my own as a network-er or maybe it is my confidence that I am a good person and any organization/business would be lucky to have an employee like me . . . cocky? No, confident! My ability to control my nerves and focus on making a good first impression on new people makes me a good interviewer.
Okay, so I passed the computer scan, the human once-over and the live interview. Now comes the hardest part, the waiting. I know I am one of the contenders but the unknown of who I am competing against starts to build anxiety. The candidates could be past employees or employees from another department. Maybe a son or daughter of an employee or a friend of the supervisor. Who knows if the other candidates have more experience or gave a better interview. All one can do at this point is wait, wait for the phone to ring.
The job hunting process is filled with controllable and uncontrollable variables. In this economy where unemployment is near 8%, a number which has gone down due to the number of Americans who have decided to remove their resumes from the job hunt entirely, it is a statistically certain that getting a job will take time and patience and maybe a miracle! Rejection will most likely be the outcome and defeat will devour you if you don't continue the hunt.
I just wish there was a way to get noticed among the sea of electronic applications. Survival instinct, I did something risky today and I tried to call one of the offices I applied for directly. I thought maybe if I spoke to someone in the department that it might tie a red balloon to my hand and make me stand out from the crowd. My optimism and courage helped me push through as the receptionist laughed at me on the phone. "Please transfer me to Human Resources", I said firmly. I would not be rebuffed! But once transferred the department of Human Resources only gave me a serious of prerecorded messages with no offer to speak to a living being.
I though I might take a trip and start walking into the offices I have applied to but envision a bold move like that removing my name from the not only the list of resumes in consideration but black list me from the entire establishment. How does one get a head in this market? How does one stand out? I think it must just be the wait and see approach for now and hope that statistically, the more applications I submit the higher my chances of being plucked from the masses and offered a job.
Job searching or hunting which denotes a struggle for survival, is not for the faint of heart. First, the application process. The process of putting together a resume that is appealing to the eyes in it's format as well as appealing to the brain for its content. It is a gamble deciding what words from the English language you should use. Now a days, most job applications have to be submitted through the Internet. No one wants a paper copy or an email with a resume attached. I have discovered they do this for very specific reasons.
When you submit a resume and cover letter into the company of interest's data system the system performs a simple word association scan. If your resume and cover letter contain a number of keywords that have been entered into the system as desirable then your application is elevated to an observation level and into human hands. So if you aren't careful in choosing your words, your application may be sent right into the cyber recycling bin without a second thought. I think of my resume screaming out as it is being sucked into a giant black hole, never to be found again!
So if you manage to survive the computer scan and make it onto the hands of a living being it doesn't mean you have finally arrived. Humans are critical and can dismiss your application for far less sophisticated reasons. For example, a manager in his/her late 50's may be threatened by a young wo/man with more education and experience and therefore may dismiss the application for his/her own security. Or even more cynical, a wo/man might simply not like the applicants name because of a past event!
I know it may seem silly or improbable to think people are so shallow but unfortunately, we are! So even if you choose all the right words your application can come to a screeching halt due to uncontrollable circumstances. However, if you have a name that doesn't trigger a PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) event in your future supervisor and are lucky enough to have a well adjusted person review your application you may just find yourself in line for an interview.
The interview, for me, is the least of my worries. I feel that I am an easy person to get along with and in a short amount of time can let my personality shine through. Maybe it's all those social events in NYC that have brought me into my own as a network-er or maybe it is my confidence that I am a good person and any organization/business would be lucky to have an employee like me . . . cocky? No, confident! My ability to control my nerves and focus on making a good first impression on new people makes me a good interviewer.
Okay, so I passed the computer scan, the human once-over and the live interview. Now comes the hardest part, the waiting. I know I am one of the contenders but the unknown of who I am competing against starts to build anxiety. The candidates could be past employees or employees from another department. Maybe a son or daughter of an employee or a friend of the supervisor. Who knows if the other candidates have more experience or gave a better interview. All one can do at this point is wait, wait for the phone to ring.
The job hunting process is filled with controllable and uncontrollable variables. In this economy where unemployment is near 8%, a number which has gone down due to the number of Americans who have decided to remove their resumes from the job hunt entirely, it is a statistically certain that getting a job will take time and patience and maybe a miracle! Rejection will most likely be the outcome and defeat will devour you if you don't continue the hunt.
I just wish there was a way to get noticed among the sea of electronic applications. Survival instinct, I did something risky today and I tried to call one of the offices I applied for directly. I thought maybe if I spoke to someone in the department that it might tie a red balloon to my hand and make me stand out from the crowd. My optimism and courage helped me push through as the receptionist laughed at me on the phone. "Please transfer me to Human Resources", I said firmly. I would not be rebuffed! But once transferred the department of Human Resources only gave me a serious of prerecorded messages with no offer to speak to a living being.
I though I might take a trip and start walking into the offices I have applied to but envision a bold move like that removing my name from the not only the list of resumes in consideration but black list me from the entire establishment. How does one get a head in this market? How does one stand out? I think it must just be the wait and see approach for now and hope that statistically, the more applications I submit the higher my chances of being plucked from the masses and offered a job.
Monday, December 5, 2011
The spa in my mind
I know it has been awhile since I have written. I had my interview at Indiana University and a week later was offered the job! I now work Monday through Friday from 8AM to 4:30PM at the Office of the Bursar as their Receptionist. Unfortunately, it is only a temporary job ending in January but for now I am happy that I am out of the house and active!
My commute from Bowling Green to Bloomington is a 50 mile trip, one way. It takes me approximately an hour to drive this distance and I make the trip twice a day, to work and back home. The commute has given me lots of time to listen to stories and news updates on NPR which makes me feel connected to the world outside of myself. Surprisingly though, what has proven to be even more useful is the time I sit in silence during my drive and just think.
Everyone I know is constantly rushing from place to place. We live in a society where the ability to successfully multi-task is coveted and taking your work home is how you get ahead. With our brains being taxed to switch concentrations every minute to keep up with the pace around us, we rarely take the time to simply think about our lives; Am I happy? What do I want in life? Where am I heading? What happened last weekend? Who do I want to receive the Republican candidacy? Should we get another dog?
Exploring theses questions and allowing my mind to wonder through the 'junk pile' in my brain is refreshing. Almost like purging your email box or cleaning out the clutter in your closet. Taking the time to 'think' instead of reacting to the million situations that pop up in a day can really change your perspective on life. I know it sounds silly but it's true! After a long drive home I feel refreshed and calm.
So instead of being upset about the amount of time I spend commuting, I have decided to turn it into a spa hour for my mind. I purge and allow room for new thoughts and ideas to enter without the old taking up space and find that I have more patience to listen to others without the distraction of my thoughts getting in the way.
As for job prospects after my temporary position ends, I have one pending. I interviewed for a position in the Office of the Registrar at SUNY (State University of New York) and will find out this week if I move onto the next round of interviews. As part of my commuting purging I have decided that if I do not have a job lined up by the end of January I will go to New York for the month of February to job hunt, hopefully staying with friends while I fill out applications and go on interviews. I will keep you posted as the months progress!
My commute from Bowling Green to Bloomington is a 50 mile trip, one way. It takes me approximately an hour to drive this distance and I make the trip twice a day, to work and back home. The commute has given me lots of time to listen to stories and news updates on NPR which makes me feel connected to the world outside of myself. Surprisingly though, what has proven to be even more useful is the time I sit in silence during my drive and just think.
Everyone I know is constantly rushing from place to place. We live in a society where the ability to successfully multi-task is coveted and taking your work home is how you get ahead. With our brains being taxed to switch concentrations every minute to keep up with the pace around us, we rarely take the time to simply think about our lives; Am I happy? What do I want in life? Where am I heading? What happened last weekend? Who do I want to receive the Republican candidacy? Should we get another dog?
Exploring theses questions and allowing my mind to wonder through the 'junk pile' in my brain is refreshing. Almost like purging your email box or cleaning out the clutter in your closet. Taking the time to 'think' instead of reacting to the million situations that pop up in a day can really change your perspective on life. I know it sounds silly but it's true! After a long drive home I feel refreshed and calm.
So instead of being upset about the amount of time I spend commuting, I have decided to turn it into a spa hour for my mind. I purge and allow room for new thoughts and ideas to enter without the old taking up space and find that I have more patience to listen to others without the distraction of my thoughts getting in the way.
As for job prospects after my temporary position ends, I have one pending. I interviewed for a position in the Office of the Registrar at SUNY (State University of New York) and will find out this week if I move onto the next round of interviews. As part of my commuting purging I have decided that if I do not have a job lined up by the end of January I will go to New York for the month of February to job hunt, hopefully staying with friends while I fill out applications and go on interviews. I will keep you posted as the months progress!
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